Take this short financial abuse quiz. Money is not the only reason you stay. But it is one of the most consistent
Leaving an abusive relationship is never simple. But one of the barriers that comes up again and again, and rarely gets spoken about plainly, is money.
Not because women are materialistic. Because abusers make money into a weapon.
What financial abuse can look like
It does not always look like someone taking your purse. It can be quieter than that. It can look like:
- Him being the only one with access to the bank account
- You having to ask for money for basic things like food or travel
- Standing at the checkout having to call or message him so he can send you the exact total for your shopping
- Him monitoring every purchase you make
- Stopping you from working, or sabotaging your job
- Running up debt in your name without your knowledge
- Making you financially dependent so that leaving feels impossible
If any of that sounds familiar, it has a name. It is financial abuse, and it is recognised as a form of domestic abuse under UK law.
You are not the only one
95% of domestic abuse survivors have experienced at least one form of economic abuse. That is not a small number. That is nearly everyone.
Is this what you are experiencing?
Here is the financial abuse quiz. Five short questions, answered honestly:
- Do you have to ask permission before spending money?
- Do you know what is in your bank account?
- Are bills, debts, or accounts in your name that you did not choose?
- Have you ever been stopped from going to work or keeping a job?
- Do you feel like you could not survive financially without him?
- Have you been left standing at the checkout waiting for him to transfer the exact total?
If you answered yes to any of these, that is worth taking seriously.
Why we start with money
We talk about money as the first step in the guide. Not because we believe this is everyone’s situation. But because having financial independence, whether you are single, married, or in a relationship, is crucial to living as a free woman. Having money means having options.
What you can do
You do not have to have everything figured out before you start. But understanding your financial position, what you are entitled to, what you can access, and how to begin separating your finances, is often what makes leaving feel possible at all.
The Women’s Railroad is the original practical guide for women in England and Wales. It starts with the money, because that is where most women need to start.
No referral. No waiting list. No one needs to know you read it.
