Domestic abuse and health control often go hand in hand. It isn’t just about your money, or where you’re allowed to go. It can mean what medication you’re allowed to take, whether you can get to an appointment, whether you’re even using contraception at all.
This has a name. Actually, two.
Our guide includes a checklist for what different forms of abuse can look like. If any of this sounds familiar, it’s there for you.
What it’s called
If he controls your contraception, your pregnancy, or your decisions about abortion, that’s reproductive coercion. If he controls your medication or your access to healthcare more broadly, researchers call this chemical control.
Both are recognised forms of domestic abuse under the law in England and Wales. Not a grey area, not “he’s just controlling”, but a named, defined category with legal consequences.
The statutory guidance for the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 lists reproductive coercion as abuse: restricting your access to birth control, refusing to use it, lying to you about using it, or forcing or denying you an abortion, IVF or a related procedure. It can also be the crime of controlling or coercive behaviour under the Serious Crime Act 2015, which carries a maximum sentence of five years in prison. If he removes a condom without your consent, that can be rape under the law in England and Wales.
What it can look like for you
- He hides, sabotages, or lies to you about using contraception
- He pressures or forces you into sex without contraception, or forces a pregnancy or a termination on you against your will
- He controls access to your prescribed medication so you can’t take it properly
- He refuses to let you go to medical or dental appointments, or reacts with anger when you do
- He controls whether your children get vaccinated
- He monitors or accesses your GP records or app to see what you’ve told a doctor
How common this actually is
Nearly a third of women in England and Wales (30.3%) have experienced domestic abuse since the age of 16. In the year to March 2025, 67 people in England and Wales were killed by a partner or ex-partner. For women who were killed, a partner or ex-partner was the most common suspect.
Around 80% of women experiencing domestic abuse will see a health professional, usually a GP, at least once. For many, it’s their only contact with any professional at all.
Reproductive coercion is common too. Research published in BMJ Sexual and Reproductive Health found that up to one in four women attending sexual and reproductive health clinics have experienced it. A UK primary care study found women with a record of domestic abuse were around twice as likely to seek emergency contraception as other women. That pattern is significant enough that a request for emergency contraception can itself be worth asking about.
Why GPs matter more than you’d think
Look at those numbers again. 80% of women experiencing domestic abuse will see a health professional at least once. Only 15% ever have that abuse referenced in their medical record.
That gap is the whole story. Health services aren’t a footnote in this. They’re often the only door you’ll walk through. Not a police station, not a court, not a refuge, but a GP surgery, for a headache, a check-up, a prescription. It can be private. No partner present. No explanation owed to anyone. That makes general practice one of the few genuinely frontline settings in this entire picture. Not every GP is a trained specialist, but they’re often the first person in a position to notice something is wrong, long before you’re ready to say it yourself.
The part almost no one tells you: your GP records can be a risk, and you can do something about it
Proxy access is where someone else is given the ability to manage your GP appointments or order your prescriptions on your behalf. The NHS recognises that this can be misused as a form of coercive control, because it can hand him direct control over your healthcare.
You can now see your own health records online through the NHS App or your practice’s online service. That’s usually a good thing, but it becomes a risk if he can force you to show him your phone or the app, because then he can see what you’ve told a doctor.
You’re allowed to ask your GP practice to switch this off, to restrict what’s visible, or to flag your file, and you don’t have to explain everything to do it. It doesn’t need a formal disclosure or a big conversation. You can simply ask.
This is one piece of a much wider picture
Health control is just one of the many forms domestic abuse takes, and it’s rarely the only one. It sits alongside financial abuse, coercive control over work and money, legal barriers you might face when trying to leave, and the gaps in family court that let contact with an abuser continue long after separation. Understanding domestic abuse properly means understanding all of the places it can reach you, not just the visible ones. The Women’s Railroad is built to map that whole range, medical, financial, legal and beyond. Wherever abuse is showing up in your life, there’s somewhere that already understands it.
Why this matters, and where The Women’s Railroad fits
This kind of control is often invisible, even to you. It doesn’t leave a mark the way other forms of abuse do, and it’s easy to explain away: “he’s just careful about money”, “he worries about side effects”, “he just wants what’s best for the baby”. But if he controls your body, he’s controlling you, and it’s abuse whether or not it comes with a bruise.
If a GP appointment is the first place any of this ever gets named, that’s exactly the moment The Women’s Railroad is built for. It’s the step after recognition, before you’re ready to speak to anyone else: a practical, plain-English guide to what happens next, covering money, exit and legal protections. No referral. No waiting list. No one needs to know you’ve read it.
Go deeper
- Dictionary: reproductive coercion, coercive control, controlling or coercive behaviour, consent, carer abuse
- Read: Is It Rape If It’s Your Boyfriend?, Financial Abuse: A 5 Question Quiz and What It Actually Looks Like, How Do I Know If My Ex Is Tracking My Phone
- Guides: our original practical guide (Get Money. Get Out. Get Rid.) covers money, exit and legal protections. Keep A Record shows you how to keep track of what’s happening, including missed appointments and withheld medication. You can find them on our Get Help page.
The Women’s Railroad is the original practical guide to equip women with the knowledge and options to navigate and leave domestic abuse. GET MONEY. GET OUT. GET RID.
